Village Voices - We don't write papers, we build scrapbooks

It was like something out of a dream …

There I was, in an Apache attack helicopter, flying over a vast wooded area. Sitting next to me, with one hand on my thigh, was none other than Michelle Pfeiffer – not the Michelle Pfeiffer from Scarface who was attitudinal and too skinny – but the Michelle Pfeiffer from What Lies Beneath and Dangerous Minds.

Now, admittedly, I love my wife dearly, but Michelle Pfeiffer … yeah, I’d be willing to burn in hell for her.

Anyway, there we were flying over the forest, looking for the treasure below that had been hidden for centuries – a treasu...