Village Voices - We don't write papers, we build scrapbooks

Just remember, the only machine in a casino that always gives you money, is the ATM.

I’m leaving you and going to Las Vegas. Men there will pay me $500 for what I do for you for free! (Fine, go, I want to see how you live off of $1000 a year.)

The difference between praying in a church, and praying in a casino, is that in a casino – you really mean it.

Casino Rule #5: Never ask the Roulette guy if the French wheel was imported.

I got lucky the last time I went gambling … I accidentally left my wallet at home.

Casino Rule #1: Never gamble more than your beneficiaries can afford t...